My Journey with Breathwork and Why I Love It
Often the simplest, most accessible tools offer us the greatest transformation. Breathwork is an invitation to connect deeply with our body to release stress and experience powerful breakthroughs.
What is Breathwork?
While there are many forms of breathing practices, the type I’m referencing is a guided breathing session that’s more of a journey than a meditation. Set to intentional music, you get to explore the deepest parts of yourself while a facilitator holds safe space.
Conscious Connected Breathing
What separates this breath practice from others:
No pauses between the inhale and exhale, creating a circular breath.
A relaxed exhale.
The Purpose of Conscious Connected Breath (CCB)
The intention is an increased flow of energy that surfaces the hidden parts of us that are ready to be seen. It’s also a bridge to altered states of awareness that can bring deep understanding.
“How we breath is how we live.”
A relaxed exhale retrains our nervous system that it’s safe to let go. We’ve learned to hold and control our breath as a way to manage our feelings. The deeper we breath, the more we feel. And with CCB, we learn that it’s safe to breath deeply.
A Body-Centred Approach
While other breath practices may focus on quieting the mind or building energy, CCB focuses on the physical and emotional body. Often it’s accompanied by spiritual experiences.
My Journey with Conscious Connecting Breathing
2018 in Costa Rica where I had my first breathwork experience
Back in 2018, I was introduced to CCB as a way to journey into the chakras for Bio-energy training. It was powerful and insightful and each session was wildly different. It was insane to me that my own breath could bring about such vivid visions, sensations and understanding.
I found that breathwork works in harmony with other therapies. It felt like I took the leap from receiving help to helping myself. I could receive support from others and had a tool for myself which kept the momentum going.
At the time of writing this, I’ve participated in about 9 group circles and 6 private sessions. Eventually I did my own 10-week journey using the self-guided book The Presence Process. I loved it and it’s a process I can always go back to when needed. Breathwork is a sacred part of my life that continually surprises me.
Now I’m on the journey of becoming a facilitator and it’s been the most exhilarating, challenging and deeply satisfying experience.
“I’ve learned that we can read all the spiritual books and collect knowledge but breathwork is what turns it into wisdom and places it permanently in your heart.” - Margaret
My Biggest Struggles
The Wounded Healer
I would help others and secretly feel angry if it didn’t go according to my plan. There was always a pressure to save/fix/rescue/heal and it stems from watching family struggle with addiction. I had no healthy boundaries on helping and felt drained.
The Perfectionist
I’m also very detail oriented and have a tendency towards perfection and control. Because of that, I lived in a constant state of restlessness—thinking about how to improve my life and stay 10 steps ahead.
Growing up, mistakes were shamed so I learned to keep things to myself. I kept traumatic secrets that eventually caused eczema as an adult. I became an over achiever because that’s how I received positive attention. I was trying to outrun the fear of feeling humiliated and alone so I tried to do everything perfectly.
The Gifts of Breathwork
“I can choose peace.”
I retired the super hero cape. I don’t have to prove that I can save the world anymore. There’s a deep knowing now that everyone has their own timeline. I was stressing out because I could see someone at Step A and held the bar for getting them to Step Z. Instead, I’m learning to step back and cheer them on for tiny wins and small steps. Each small step is worth celebrating.
I’m enjoying the process instead of the destination. I used to chase the big milestones but now I see that life is made up of many simple moments. The big milestones are like the chapter headings and life in between are the paragraphs of wisdom.
I’m experiencing more harmony in my life. Ironically as I let go of striving and impatience, fulfilling opportunities come to me with ease. Whenever I start reaching a little too far, I ask myself again—what’s my version of success? And the answer always grounds me again.
“I can be fierce.”
Fierceness was only modelled to me as violent rage and I didn’t understand how it could exist alongside peace. I was scared of it and avoided it—but as it came out during breathwork I reclaimed my power and my “bigness”.
Breathwork showed me how I was shrinking myself every time I felt powerless. Now I know it’s a choice—I don’t have to shrink my energy or back down when I get triggered. Fierceness is an inner experience first that may require outer expression to stand our ground. I can use this energy to set healthy boundaries for myself and channel into my goals.
Being fierce is an openness to the highs and lows of life and cultivating courage to move through it—not around it. It’s standing up for our values and being our authentic selves regardless of what others think.
“I can be tender.”
I had a streak of being nice on the outside and secretly being judgemental and intolerant on the inside. No matter how much I “tried” to be compassionate, it wasn’t changing. Then it hit me: “You can’t give what you didn’t get.”
I grew up in a religious home with immigrant parents who were doing their best but didn’t know how to model patience, gentleness or compassion. I learned to be hard on myself and projected this standard on everyone else too.
Breathwork allowed me to connect with my heart and the tenderness it deserves. An open heart felt as vulnerable as a baby’s heart and I created a wall to protect myself from getting hurt. Just as a wall can’t selectively block, in limiting all the lows I was also limiting the highs.
This self-compassion thing is new for me. I get to love myself even when I make mistakes. I’m learning to accept my vulnerabilities and flaws because if I didn’t have them I would never have gotten to where I am. I’m showing up to the world more authentic and imperfect and feel a softening towards others that I don’t have to force now.
Perfection divides us because it doesn’t exist—it’s our vulnerabilities that make us human and connect us. That perfect mom who has all her shit together doesn’t exist!
Healthy giving starts with myself and now I can be a better caregiver because of it.
The Missing Piece to Healing
As a massage therapist, I’ve noticed that people are aware that stress is contributing to their health issues but 1) don’t have the practical tools to connect with their body or 2) feel safe enough to stay in uncomfortable feelings until they’re complete.
While things like massage can be supportive for stress, many people tend to rely on it rather than addressing the mental and emotional root cause. In my experience, the willingness to address the root when I was ready cleared up many of my health issues, including eczema and digestive issues.
Breathwork offers us a path to self-awareness and authenticity where we can safely explore our vulnerability and power and create big shifts in our lives.
Ready to Experience Conscious Connected Breathwork?
Online
Journey Into Breath (who I trained with) offers a free monthly online community breathwork circle as well as in-person group ceremonies in Vancouver, BC here.
In Person
Join us at our next monthly breathwork ceremony in South Surrey, BC.
